holy matrimonies

Most commonly received question lately: Does it have to be legal?

We're down to 152 hours left (accurate this time) and more than me having the jitters, everyone around me seems to feel it too. I say seems because there's a good chance I'm just projecting that and every time someone brings it up, I feel like they feel anxious, which is actually me feeling anxious... "Oh, you're getting married soon." "HOLY SHIT, STOP STRESSING ME OUT."

I'm working out the final details of the evening now, a la ceremony and all that. I think the party portion is taken care of. The legal side is all that's making me anxious now, really. Well, that's kind of a lie, but mostly true. We still do not have a birth certificate, and while it should be fine, I'm getting a bit worried that it might just not come. It occurred to me that maybe Mother in Law #1 is not a fan of the project, which would maybe make sense, and is withholding the birth certificate intentionally. I can't blame her, but in the off-chance she'll ever read this I'd like to emphasize that I've talked to lawyers about this and everything will be okay.

I don't think I want to get long-winded about explaining this whole thing, but I would like to say specifically that it is very important, crucial even, that this be a legal marriage. To avoid being obtuse - I don't have a problem with people who are in committed monogamous relationships, and if they choose marriage as an expression of that, then that's cool. But there's a problem with marriage being represented as a natural inclination, and a "natural institution" even. One that's supposedly an inevitable part of most people's lives, and one which cannot be challenged socially because it has an inherent character. My marriages will be marriages only because of the legal definition, and if that's still valid to most people, then clearly there's a state-constructed character here that is malleable by the individuals who participate in it.

There's probably a more coherent way of saying that. I'll work on it. In the mean time, I'm going to glare at the sewing machine a bit more. My backup plan is officially to wear my prom dress.